Goofus Maximus

I offer this up as a lighthearted cautionary tale to anyone who has ever given a presentation.

I'll set the stage. The meeting was happening in the big agency boardroom. There were six or seven clients in the room, a couple of account people, a couple of VPs, and the big VP creative director.

Those of us who were presenting were on a four hour call -- we could be beckoned at any time.

My call came just before lunch.

I was invited into the room to do my dog and pony show as the lunch trolleys sat outside the boardroom. You have to be pretty gosh darned entertaining to compete with the lunch trolley during an all day meeting, let me tell you.

So, in I come. In one hand I have the presentation boards, my note book, my notes for the presentation, and a pen. In the other hand I have -- wait for it -- A GLASS OF WATER.

Okay, I think you know where this is going.

My depth perception is pretty bad. In fact, if we ever find ourselves on a plane where the pilot has been poisoned and they're looking for someone to land it...you'd be better off with that child in row 12.

So, in I come and run into the wall with the presentation boards while my glass does a slow motion water spill on to the...floor, thank goodness.

By way of recovery, I looked at the clients (who, by now, were thinking that this could be a whole lot better than lunch) and said, "Yup. Went into advertising because I'm such a lousy waitress."

All okay in the end. I think they may have liked me more because of my humanity.