Friday, April 25, 2008

Libra Rising

I don't know very much about astrology, but my Dad was a Libra and exhibited a lot of the characteristics I've heard assigned to that astrological sign. Primary among them -- an inability to make decisions.

He weighed every option. He belaboured every outcome. He went up one side of a problem and came down the other. He over-thought things to death. Then he often did nothing.

In retrospect, I have a lot of compassion for this.

I think being raised by an emotional distant father with a drinking problem may have made him fearful about choosing incorrectly. He became so afraid of making the wrong decision that he made no decision at all.

Fear immobilizes.

I often think about my Dad when I'm faced with making decisions. Because, even though he had difficulty making decisions for himself, he had absolutely no problem making them for me.

Control was his middle name. It could easily be mine, too, but I'm looking to have it legally removed from my birth certificate.

To do this, I've had to unlearn certain patterns too numerous to mention here, but one of which is this: not making a decision, is actually a decision.

Another is this -- despite deeply resenting being told what to do, sometimes I secretly crave having someone tell me what to do. This makes it so much easier to blame the decision-makers if it turns out to be the wrong decision.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

The only wrong decision is indecision.

Blodwynn said...

As a Libra myself, here's the thing...we try to maintain balance therefore sitting in the middle is a more comfortable place.

Joe said...

I read, that 50% of our decisions are actually wrong. Then I read that the number is actually higher, like 70%. I think it came out of a Harvard Study. Not sure how they decide what is wrong but ... To keep me from digressing ...

Any way, there is some solice (whatever that is), in knowing that we CORRECT our initial decision, because we get feedback from the "world" about how our initial decision is "going." Then we adjust the initial decision or make another decision that corrects the first one.

Does that even make sense (what I wrote)?

So, make a decision. Look for facts. Sleep on it. Ask others and of course use your gut too.

Most decisions can be corrected along the way or adjusted.

Of course, deciding to set your hair on fire and put it out with an axe will take a little longer to correct.

My best.

PS - To the title of your book from an earlier post; "I'M OK, YOU'RE OK," I heard this one "I'M OK, YOU'RE NOT SO HOT." A little humor this morning (maybe, very little).

Joe

Joe said...

Helps if I spell it correctly; "solace" ....